Pauline Boss, PhD D has written several books on dealing with "Ambiguous Loss." Who knew that reading a book on Loving Someone Who Has Dementia would help me with the loss of my life and livelihood? I was reading the book to aid in dealing with aging relatives, primarily my dad and mom when I found guidance to help me move on with the "ambiguous loss" of my own life and livelihood.
I have been frozen in grief because of what happened to me seven years ago, although the stalking and terrorism started before and continues to this day. I am now learning to cope better with the grief of the loss, the stalking and terrorism is a little more complicated. I still hope and pray that one day those responsible will be caught and held accountable for stalking and terrorizing; in the very least I pray that they would not assume and destroy someone else's life based on rumor and gossip. They may find themselves dead wrong and then what is one to do? Apologize?
Pauline Boss is a pioneer on the subject of family stress and in the 1970s, she began to notice a type of “frozen grief", she termed as ambiguous loss. There are many resources in the field of grief and family stress, many written by Dr. Boss that is for the helpers, the caregivers. This book, Loving Someone Who Has Dementia, is for the caregiver. It's written in easy to understand language and is divided into manageable chapters to facilitate reading and application so that the caregiver can digest and use the information as nourishment for ones soul. If you are a caregiver of someone who has dementia or has suffered "ambiguous loss" this book will wrap its words around you and give you comfort and support.