Tuesday, August 28, 2012

Ambiguous Loss

Pauline Boss, PhD D has written several books on dealing with "Ambiguous Loss."  Who knew that reading a book on Loving Someone Who Has Dementia would help me with the loss of my life and livelihood?  I was reading the book to aid in dealing with aging relatives, primarily my dad and mom when I found guidance to help me move on with the "ambiguous loss" of my own life and livelihood.  

I have been frozen in grief because of what happened to me seven years ago, although the stalking and terrorism started before and continues to this day.  I am now learning to cope better with the grief of the loss, the stalking and terrorism is a little more complicated.  I still hope and pray that one day those responsible will be caught and held accountable for stalking and terrorizing; in the very least I pray that they would not assume and destroy someone else's life based on rumor and gossip.  They may find themselves dead wrong and then what is one to do?  Apologize?   

Pauline Boss is a pioneer on the subject of family stress and in the 1970s, she began to notice a type of “frozen grief", she termed as ambiguous loss. There are many resources in the field of grief and family stress, many written by Dr. Boss that is for the helpers, the caregivers.  This book, Loving Someone Who Has Dementia, is for the caregiver.  It's written in easy to understand language and is divided into manageable chapters to facilitate reading and application so that the caregiver can digest and use the information as nourishment for ones soul.  If you are a caregiver of someone who has dementia or has suffered "ambiguous loss" this book will wrap its words around you and give you comfort and support.

Loving Someone Who Has Dementia: How to Find Hope while Coping with Stress and Grief       

Friday, August 17, 2012

Soups On

I enjoy butternut squash soup.  It is an acquired taste.  I like the velvety smooth roasted squash texture with a hint of cinnamon.  But, not everyone in the family likes butternut squash.

So the other day I decided to try something a little creative.  I prepared the Campbell's Butternut Squash Soup as instructed and added a can of Superb Sweet Whole Kernel Corn (well drained).  I let it simmer on low for about twenty minutes and right before serving I add a cup of half and half.

It was a hit!  My dad ate every last drop of the soup and mom asked if I'd make it for her friends.  I call it Peggy Jo's Butternut Squash Sweet Corn Soup.
Try it you might like it!

Tuesday, August 7, 2012

Dreams of Joy

In her beloved New York Times bestsellers Snow Flower and the Secret Fan, Peony in Love, and, most recently, Shanghai Girls, Lisa See has brilliantly illuminated the potent bonds of mother love, romantic love, and love of country. Now, in DREAMS OF JOY, she returns to these timeless themes, continuing the story of sisters Pearl and May from Shanghai Girls, and Pearl’s strong-willed nineteen-year-old daughter, Joy.
Reeling from newly uncovered family secrets, and anger at her mother and aunt for keeping them from her, Joy runs away to Shanghai in early 1957 to find her birth father—the artist Z.G. Li, with whom both May and Pearl were once in love.
Dazzled by him, and blinded by idealism and defiance, Joy throws herself into the New Society of Red China, heedless of the dangers in the communist regime and the Great Leap Forward. READ MORE

Sunday, August 5, 2012

Alwrite all ready!

I know, I know, I have not been writing lately.  I knew earlier this spring I was not going to write much this summer, hence, the few blog posts.  I have been rather worn out and have not had the energy to write.

Lately, I have been hankering to write, but I am trying to keep the poison pen from becoming the only reason I write. Funneling all the negative energy into positive energy takes some mastery over raw emotions and other crap.

I have been reading a good bit and I have seen a good deal of wonderful things happening in the literary realm.  Checkout Poets and Writers, The Writer, Writer's Digest, and other trade magazines and you will find an abundance of workshops, contests, and new and up coming writers in the field reviews that will inspire you.

I hope to enter a few writing contests this Fall, if I can find the muses who have disappeared.  Really, I do not blame them at all for the long hiatus.  I need a vacation.  I think many, many, people are in need of a vacation.  Everyone needs to get away from it all every now and then.  So, if you can get away...leave the iphone, tablet, and any other electrical devise at home. Breathe deep and take a walk...along the beach, in the woods, or up the mountain.